Ichiro Statue Fail | NBA's 65 Game Rule Screws Luka | FIFA Hates Fans

The whole crew is back in the Speakeasy tonight, and sports got even dumber this week.

The Seattle Mariners tried to honor Ichiro, and his statue immediately broke mid-unveil. You can’t make this up.

Meanwhile, MLB gave us peak nonsense with back-to-back overturned calls on the same play. And John Smoltz went old man, hating on ABS.

In the NBA, Luka Dončić wins the scoring title, and gets NOTHING because of the 65-game rule. Absolute clown show.

Plus:
- The greatest anti-tanking idea ever: beer prices tied to wins and losses
- Dianna Russini resigns over the Mike Vrabel hot tub scandal
- FIFA and the state of Ohio battle it out for MFer of the Week
- Rory McIlroy goes back-to-back at The Masters

Grab a drink. This one goes off the rails.

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